Top 5 gripes with the internet in 2019

1. High-Up Idiocy 

GCHQ Cookies

Which one are you supposed to click on? Can you get it wrong? Do they check? 

2. Typographic Errors

Amazon Business Fromester Spelling Mistakes

Even the online giants don’t find it (s)easy to proof read everything before publishing. The Amazon Business team didn’t spot it. Is it deliberate? Typing hiccups, grammar and spelling mistakes are very common in 2019.  

3. Thorough Testing

Yell not taking the time for positive encouragement. A free online reputation report that says your business is rubbish.


4. Not making sure it still works

Eco Webhosting

Web hosting company certificate issues. When the web hosting company you were considering using doesn’t work, that.


5. Too many lists of irrelevant things


Next 5 steps

We all hate passwords, no one understands encryption and we’ve all been pwned. Cats and other pets are known to step on keyboards and mice and on occasion press the “Add to Basket” button multiple times, it’s all just got to stop.

Step 1

Simplify operating systems and educate users to have a better understanding of computers, especially security.

Step 2

Resurrect Steve Jobs and ask him what to do. 

Step 3

Make another internet on the dark side of the moon using only cats. This may have already been done.

Step 4

GOSUB 2020

Buy less stuff. Make, sell and buy things that last more than a lifetime.

END

Step 5

Eat more noodles. Be optimistic. Do not litter.


2020 STARTSUB

$Invent trackpad or mouse that cats cannot interact with

Loop

Change Password

Wait a few weeks

Exit Loop If will_to_live = lost

$Delete Facebook

2020 ENDSUB

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